Types of Relationship SEX

Relationship SEX

Can individuals be in a relationship and only have sex? What kind of relationship is it? Will it be considered a relationship? Is there satisfaction? Happiness?

In this blog, I discuss three different types of sexual relationships; Friends with Benefits Relationships, Committed Relationships, and Soul Mate Relationships. 

In my previous blog I discussed some differences between love and lust, so now we’ll focus on sex in the relationships. For the record, I have been there, done that with all three, and I’m happy to say, I’m loving Soul Mate love-making. Don’t hate! 😊

Friends with Benefits

This relationship steams lustful sex. You enjoy each other for the pleasure of each other’s bodies. If there is a deal made in the beginning stating no feelings involved, then you have pure, unadulterated lust and sexual desire. When a friendship exists before sex, it can make sex easier. The couple aren't strangers so there is a connection between them. However, sex is a very prominent factor in this relationship, and the involved parties don’t mind their position. 

Here are some of the reasons people have FWB:

·         No strings attached

·         No emotional connection (purely physical)

·         No stress

·         No romance required or expected

I know a couple who started out in an agreement to have Friends with Benefits sex, but she began to develop feelings. He decided to give it a chance since they were already having sex. When they decided to start dating, guess what? The sex changed. It lacked what they had before, the intensity was gone. Crazy, right? They ended up going their separate ways and aren’t even friends anymore. In my case, I didn’t have an agreement with my friend, I just knew they weren’t the one. 

According to Psychology Today, Dr. Aaron Ben Zeev states, "Such a relationship (Friends with Benefits) is very common among people in their 20s (research suggests that over 50%  have had such a relationship at least once). but it occurs among other age groups as well."
  
https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/in-the-name-love/201109/friends-benefits

Committed Relationship

Whether you’re married, engaged to be married, or in a long-term relationship, you engage in commitment sex. This reflects a higher level than FWB because of the deeper emotional connection, intimacy, and longevity between the couple. Some called the sex “love-making,” because it’s not just sex. The intimacy, sensuality, commitment, desire, needs, wants, everything wrapped into one, creates this heightened level. Which can be exhausting at times (in a good way of course!)

 However, sometimes the fire could die when the stresses of life. When conflicts and disagreements take precedence in the relationship, resulting in a distance and tense atmosphere, one must be intentional to increase romance. Making time for each other, apologizing when necessary, can take back your relationship. At the end of the day, you and your partner are the ones reaping the benefits of the commitment.

Here are a few reasons people prefer committed sex:

·         Love.

·         Monogamy

·         Exploring and getting to go to deeper levels of intimacy (it exists)

·         You get to fully enjoy each other in the moments of lovemaking.

Soul Mate Relationships

When love surpasses everything and reaches the soul. The intimacy is different, special with a deeper connection. The sexual exchange is passionate, emotional and both persons gave 100 percent. This type of relationship takes dedication and commitment towards a common goal. Both persons are willing to do what it takes to get there and has overcome several obstacles together.  It looks unattainable, but it takes more than the human ability to reach. A spiritual connection goes deeper than what you see, and to love the person “no matter what.” When you love like that, the lovemaking transcends what you think, know, or believe. Some people cry not because of pain, but of the connection made during the transfer. Remember love is an action, and because of love, you feel.

It takes a journey to reach this stage, It doesn’t happen overnight. However, when you get there, you’ll never want to leave or settle for less ever again.  

This quote from Psychology today sums up the soul experience, "the soul of sex has the power to evoke relationship, to sustain it, and to make it worthwhile. As with all things of the soul, we are asked to stand out of the way and be affected by its power to quicken life and to transform us from practical survivors into erotic poets of our own lives."

https://www.psychologytoday.com/articles/199403/soul-mates

So, readers, where are you right now? Friends with Benefits, Committed, or Soul Mate? Feel free to comment, share, or ask questions below.

**I’m not a relationship expert. I just Love, Laugh & Live out Loud**